|
Home
For the Love of
Dogs!
Menu of Dog Breeds
Bones and Chew Toys
Paw
Prints
Houses, Rosettes & More
Letter Postoids
Sealed with a Kiss/Slobber
Expressions A-I
Expressions J-Z
Agility & Obedience
Rescue and Sick Doggie
Christmas - Holidays
Other Dog Stamps
Other Creatures:
Kitty Collection
Horse Collection (A to C)
Horse Collection (C to
F)
Horse Collection (F to
H)
Horse Collection (H to
R)
Horse Collection (R to
W)
Foxes
Rabbits & Bunnies
Guinea Pigs, Ferrets,
Rodents
Farm Animals
Feathered
Friends
Stamping Supplies:
Dye
Inkpads
Pigment Inkpads
Embossing Powders
Heat Guns
|
|
The dishes on the floor with the paw prints are yours and contain
YOUR
food.
The other dishes
are mine and contain MY food. Placing a your paw in the middle of
my plate does not mean that it
is suddenly your food, nor do I find that
aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
|
The
stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack.
Racing me to the
top of the stairs is not the object. Tripping me doesn't help
because I fall faster than you can run. |
I cannot
buy anything bigger than a king sized bed.
I am very sorry
about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to
ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball
when they sleep. It Is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each
other, stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know
that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out on
the other end to maximize space that you are taking up, is nothing
but sarcasm. |
For the
last time, there is no secret exit from the bathroom!
If, by some
miracle, I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not
necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or get your paw
under the edge in an attempt to open the door. I must exit through
the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the bathroom for
years - canine/feline attendance is not required. |
The
proper order for kissing is:
Kiss me first, then
go smell the other dog or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough. |
|
Finally,
in fairness, dear pets, I have posted the following message on the
front door:
TO ALL NON-PET OWNERS WHO VISIT AND COMPLAIN
(1) They live here....you don't.
(2) If you don't want their hair on your clothes,
stay off the furniture.
That's why they call it
“fur”-niture.
(3) I like my pets a lot better than I like most
people.
(4) To you, they are animals. To me, they are adopted
sons/daughters who
are short, hairy, walk on all fours and don't
speak clearly.
|
Remember, dogs and cats are
better than kids because they:
(1)
eat less,
(2) don't ask for money all the time,
(3) are easier to train,
(4) normally come when called,
(5) never ask to drive the car,
(6) don't hang out with drug-using people;
(7) don't smoke or drink,
(8) don't want to wear your clothes,
(9) don't have to buy the latest fashions,
(10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college and
(11) if they get pregnant, you can sell their children
|
Inner
Peace: This is
so true
If you can start
the day without caffeine,
If you can always
be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,
If you can
resist complaining and boring
people with your troubles,
If you can
eat the same food everyday and be grateful for it,
If you can
understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you
any time,
If you can
take criticism and blame
without resentment,
If you can
conquer tension without medical help,
If you can relax
without alcohol,
If you can
sleep without the aid of drugs,
...Then You
Are Probably
.........
The Family Dog!
|
|
|
|
|
|